Just Emkaying: A note to the omnipresent mosquito

Aug 14, 2010

A note to the omnipresent mosquito

Dear Mosquito

Greetings. I write this e mail (which I shall buzz to you in your language later) with reference to your (or was it one of you million cousins?) buzz in my ear 10 min back

Ever since I could remember, I knew you were around me. At first I thought those red marks on my skin were your way of showing your presence, but know I realize that I am nothing more than a fridge with blood to you. You come and drink whenever you want, and now even your friends are treating me the same.

I can hear you buzzing around, but you never say Hi. This has made me to think that you were shy, but some of my friends have been terrorized by you and your gangs with dengue and malaria, and am beginning to doubt your intentions. So far,  I have treated you with a harmless coil, or a repellent to keep you at a distance. But things are getting out of hand.

You visit in the middle of the night, when am fast asleep, and bite me all over. And then buzz off. Hence this mail. Push has come to shove, and now I am going to take no more abuse from you (sniff, sniff) If you ever try to come near me again, I shall bring down destruction and death thru Lord MORTEIN or Lord HIT or Lord FASTKILL himself. And then I shall not be responsible for any repercussions.

Let me also let you know that the spider clan has promised to support me if I spare them from the roll of paper my room mate uses as a spider-kill-thingy. I may not be able to see you, but they're webs can.

Additionally, If need be, I shall speak to The Mosquito Killers League, and then there is no way back.

So this is my last buzz....err warning. Keep your filthy nose/wings/whatever other parts you have, off my property!!! Before I blow you to smithereens!!!

Buzzzzz Off
Yours Bloodily,
Your ex- Blood Bank.

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